Friday, March 8, 2013

Busy Bee... But Too Busy for You??

Relationships require hard work! There's always that one couple that seems "perfect" to everyone- doesn't get into arguments, both lead seemingly "perfect" lives, amazing connection!

However, I honestly believe that no matter what, relationships take a lot of hard work to keep one going. Both partners in the relationship need to put in effort, not one over the other. Sometimes one may feel that he or she is giving more in the relationship but that hopefully is not the real case with the relationship. Otherwise, it may be time for a talk.

Another scenario: Peter is currently immersed in his life: school, work, sports, social life. His girlfriend, Mary, currently feels that she is being a bit left out of his life. She understands that Peter is busy and the fact that they both go to different schools doesn't really help because of the short distance. However, she feels that he squeezes her in his schedule whenever it is convenient for him rather than for the both of them. She just wants him to put aside a few minutes at the beginning or end of the day so they can talk about their day or anything... any reassurance that their relationship and connection is still the same. She doesn't know whether or not to express this to him or just to hide her feelings and stick it out. What should she do?

My personal opinion is that she should talk to Peter about it! I have been through this certain experience before and if I had hid my feelings, I might have just bottled it up until one day it burst out and made the situation worse than I intended. I think tone and reasoning are extremely important in this situation because if handled in the wrong way, Peter may take Mary's feelings in the wrong way and take the situation in the way that Mary is being too sensitive and wanting Peter to take on less things in his life and spend it with her instead. However, Mary also has to realize that she has to find the line between being too sensitive and actually justifying her emotions. If she is able to convey that she understands that he is busy with his commitments but asks that he put aside 5 minutes at the end of the day to catch up and say good night to each other with him understanding that she is only trying to help their relationship, it will hopefully end well for the both of them. (Compromise always works well!)

What's your opinion? Do you agree or disagree with my handling of the situation? Have you been through this before?

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